Not Everyday Will Be As We Plan!

Hello dear friends!
Just a reminder that no matter how prepared we are, no matter how ready we think we are some days just don't go as plan. We have to be able to flow and roll with the punches. Remember feelings of today do not have to be feelings that are forever. Unexpected things occur pout of now where, people can let you down, you can let yourself down even. We need to remember:

Just because others do things that are hurtful, we can chose to be better people. To remember to be kind and treat others as we want to be treated. To remember that words hurt, contrary to the popular nursery rhyme. Our words and actions have a lasting effect, like a ripple in the water. What kind of ripples are being sent from you? Just a few things I have been thinking about today! Hope everyone has a great day!

Xx,
Michelle

Negative Comments From Youself!

Morning Friends!

I just want to chitbchat about negative thoughts inside your own head. Lately I have been hearing my kids making comments like "I'm so stupid!!" When they make a mistake or do something wrong. This drives me crazy, because I am my hardest critic. I tried to explain to then that they shouldn't be saying stuff like that, to which they reply "I know, I was joking." But they weren't. Isn't it how it starts? You are already putting yourself down, and someone else comes along and makes a similar comment and BAM- now you start thinking - "Well, if I think that l, and they think that, maybe it's true!" The seed of self doubt is planted. If it not ok for you to surround yourself with negativity, they why is it ok for us to continually put yourself down?

I have learned that you won't always have support, you need to be your own cheerleader. You need to be encouraging yourself and cutting yourself some slack for things that happen. We are human and make mistakes. I know I would tell someone I love the things that I have told myself, so why should I continue to put myself down? There are enough people out there who would be more than willing to tear me apart.

So much unnecessary negativity do you produce in your own head? Why do we allow ours to put ourselves down and shrug it off as a "joke?" I know I am guilty of it! It is hard to tell myself to knock it off!

Hope everyone is enjoying their day!

Sometimes We Need To Just Breathe.

It's Sunday! Yeah and boo! Boo because tomorrow is Monday :( 

Yeah because today I decided is a day to breathe. The weight of the world has seemed heavy on my shoulders, the kids have been extra lovely (sarc.) and my internal compass is discombobulated! I need a day to relax, to breathe. To center myself, gather my mind, nurture my soul. I hope you have a great day and don't forget to make time for yourself! It is something that is often neglected! Enjoy your Sunday! 😀

🌞 day <--- lol that amused me. (More than it should have. 😜)

Xx,
Michelle

Loving People When They Are Less Than Lovable

This is such a true statement, and also a really hard one to remember! When I think on my life, and my most unlovable moments, these are times when I did need love the most. When I was hurt, angry, sad, lonely. I think we can all admit that when we are feeling these emotions we may be less than lovable. We may have negative responses, attitudes, anger but in reality we need love. Even though at the time we might not admit it. I have a hard time remembering this, especially with four kids and a husband on sick leave! With so many people in the house there are bound to be moments of negativity and emotions on the rise. It is especially hard when I am overly stressed, to react with love to my children and husband. Some days I don't want to even deal with it. I struggle with the fact that I was an only child, and loved my alone time. My alone time helped me center myself. As a mother and wife you have to make sacrifices for your family, so my alone time has shortened greatly! I know that when my husband or children are acting in a negative manner, that I need to step up and do something. Even if I am feeling less than lovable that day. If I don't do it, who will? I don't want my children to look to the wrong people for love and acceptance. That is what I did and it lead to more pain and heartbreak in my life. So remember next time a friend or loved one is acting like a donkey (😉) that they might just need some love!

Xx,
Michelle

People can't change! (Or can they?)

This is one phrase that drives me crazy. A person can't change. I beg to differ. I absolutely believe people can change. I myself, have changed many many times I think people don't want to change or chose not too because, let's face it change can be hard. Especially when it comes to aspect of one's self. To say you need to change is admitting that you are not perfect. Our bodies are changing all the time cells are bing made as one ones die off. Our brains are changing, our taste buds etc, but people cannot change? Yes we can, but it requires daily work and looking inward. When I was growing up my parents were the example on how not to be and I learned a lot of negative behaves and reactions from living in that environment. I realized that I was being to treat people the same way my mother did, and honestly it made me sick. I had to make a conscious effort to think first and be aware of how I was treating people and reacting to situations. It was extremely difficult at first, but you have to have to want to change. Change for yourself to be a better person, not because someone is telling to you change. I still struggle with my attitude and responding to people but I don't mind. This means that I am still learning and growing. So what do you think? Can people change and why don't they?

Recipe For Life

(Image courtesy of foto76 at FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

Add a pinch of balance, a dash of moderation, mix well with a cup of common sense, bake at 365 days for 12 months, enjoy! 

Lol well that got cheesey quick!! I don't claim to have have life figured out but I do think that we as people tend to over-complicate things, I know I do! It took me awhile to get to where I am and I believe that it is because of my recipe.

First is balance. The is a natural balance in life. Good/evil. Right/wrong. For every act a reaction. In your personal life you have to work on balance. When bad comes you have to find the good in it or make some good. Balance the negative with a positive. While it would be awesome to have the scales tip with the weight of good things, in my world that just don't happen so I have to balance them myself.

Second is moderation. it seems like we are living in times of extreme! I see all these fad diets and man, it drives me crazy! One year you hear eggs are great. They are the "incredible, edible egg!" Then all of a sudden eggs at full of cholesterol and are bad for you. Then they went back to being good. I have seen this with many products. To me it is simple. Everything in moderation!! This goes with things in life. We need to show self control and stop over indulging. It is ok to want. Want gives you motivation. But you also be content. Don't the want take over your life. In so many was can this be dangerous and produce negative effects.

Common Sense Where has common sense gone? In the way people act and treat each is other has become deplorable! So often you hear about stopping the bullying in schools and Love one another. Where is this for adults? We have to set the example. The internet has allowed people tool rip people apart while they hid faceless behind the computer. It is simple to me. Treat others how you want to be treated! If you want to be forgiven (which I think most people at some point in their life want to be forgiven!) Then you have to forgive others, and most import forgive yourself. You are human and mistakes! Now let me ask a question. When does some need love the most? Answer: when they are less then lovable. This is a hard one, I admit. But think about it from you point of view. When you are hurt, sad, angry you don't act like an angel. You need love even if you don't want to admit it at the time.

So sorry this is a long post, I just felt it was important. And like I said I don't claim to know it all, or have all the answers. Just wanted to share what was weighing on my heart!

Xx,
Michelle

The World In Which We Live

I don't really use social media. I created a Google+ profile awhile ago and have been using that. Then I went to Tmz to post a comment and found Disqus. I watched  comments and exchanges between people and was sickened. People just attack others left and right and on a personal level. How do you attack someone on a personal level when you don't even know the person? What kind of society do we live in now? Maybe I am old fashioned. Maybe parents stopped teaching respect to others. In this day and age all you hear about is acceptance, love, respect. Where is it? While I might not agree with someone lifestyle choices, religion, or political views, it doesn't make that person less of a human for it. It is not my job to judge others. We all bleed red last I knew. I don't want someone to judge me so why would I do that to them. It is great to be passionate about issues, but i feel that one you attack someone, that person misses your point and automatically becomes defensive. Here's the thing tho, most people on the internet want you to get all worked up and fight back. I like to laugh at them and tell them they are funny because I don't care what people say, and chances are what they say to me probably isn't worse than what I have said to myself. I try to remember that people who others are most likely hurt themselves, weather they lack self esteem, or someone has hurt them. You need to forgive them, love them, and if you are religious pray for them. This is hard because it is hard to love someone when you feel that they don't deserve it, but honestly that is when they need it most. You may not be able to get through to that person but you can feel good that you rose above the hate and negativity, because they doesn't seem to many people who will.

I have not always been like this, keep in mind. It took growing up and maturing to realise. You live, you love, and hopefully learn.

What are your thoughts? How do you deal with negativity and rude people?

Xx,
Michelle

Dealing With The Winter Blues

Hello Friends! Look at this picture above. Beautiful, right? WRONG! I am so sick of winter! Yes, this is a beautiful picture, if you like the cold, slushy sidewalks, bundling up in multiple layers just to go down the street. I, for one, am over it. OVER. IT. Please bring on the sun! I am not asking for summer weather (just yet) some spring weather would be nice.
     Living in Ohio, we have all four seasons. Which I love, I really do! I love spring when everything is warming up and coming to life. I love watching my Lilac bushes grow and the smell of the fragrant flower filling my nose!  I love fall with all it's crispness and colors! And every year I try to love winter. Sure it is beautiful when the snow and ice stick to the trees and plants. And wow is it beautiful to see light hitting the snow and making it glitter. But that is where it ends for me. Why can't we just have snow for Christmas and New Years and then be done with it. Just the other day our temperature was 61 degrees, followed by the 40's the next day. What a tease! There were so many people out and about and to be honest I felt bad for them. Everyone wants the weather to warm up so we can get out of the house and get out of the funk that is the Winter Blues. It is this time of year where we have had enough. I can't wait till the days of not bundling up to walk to library, to not have watch out for ice when walking on the sidewalks. To breathe in the scents of plants, trees and grass growing. When will this ice hell end? I am a summer baby and it seems like the older I get the colder I get. Literally. I remember being a young kid and playing in the snow. My parents were always yelling at me to "zip up my coat" and "put a hat on." I find myself saying the same things to my own kids. In just 5 years I went from running around the house in tanks tops to wearing multiple layers and slippers just to be remotely warm. I. Hate. It.
     So what can be done to help deal with the winter blues? Besides praying for warmth? lol not many but here are a few things that may help bring you n from the cold and warm your spirits!

1. Look into what plants you are wanting to grow in the spring/summer and research what all needs to be done to grow them successfully. If you need to plant indoors then you may be able to start working on that to warm up your "green thumb."

2. Start thinking about summer food that you want to try to make. Remember that some vegetables grow in different seasons. You can also explore the list and maybe find new recipes to add to your oldie but goodie summer food list!

3. Turn on a space heater in your bathroom and pretend it's summer! No, I am just joking. Unless you actually want to do this - then so be it. Go for it! Have a blast!

4. Make a bucket list of things you would like to do when the warm weather finally arrives. You might be surprised at the things you can come up with ahead of time!

I know this isn't a big list. Unfortunately if you live in a place that had winter you just have to wait it out. Be strong, friends! The warmth will be here again!  :)

From my cold location to yours!

Xo,

Michelle

5 Inexpensive Valentine's Day Date Ideas

Hello Friends!

With Valentine's Day right around the corner and Valentine's Day being shoved down everyone's throat on tv, and in stores, I decided to jump on board the Valentine's Day train! It seems like more people focus on the amount of money spent on the significant other, rather than the thought put into it. Let's face it, some times the funds for an over the top Valentine's Day just isn't there, so I have come up with 5 Inexpensive, fun, thoughtful Valentine's Day Date Ideas!

1. Body Paint Date - For this fun date night idea you can purchase actually body paint or if you want to spice things up buy editable body paint or use items from the grocery store such as chocolate syrup, whip cream etc. You can use imagination run wild and think of items that will add color. Take time to paint each other and enjoy the time together! Afterward you can take a picture to capture the moment forever. However I caution you posting it to instagram or other social media sites! Lol

2. Fondue - or should I say "fundue" - yeah I know that was a really bad pun! Anyway, get ur self a fondue pot and have a cosy night in complete with candlelight atmosphere of course! I love having fondue night! I always buy too much food. I forget that since you are taking time making the food you eat slower and fill up on a small amount! Having one fondue pot is helpful if you want to do a cheese course, a meat and veggie course, and of course a dessert course of melted chocolate or other delicious treat! You can use one pot but it is a little more time consuming because you have to clean the pot between courses.

3. Plan a picnic - This one can be done in a living room, outside (depending on where you live!) Or you could even surprise your honey if your significant other has to work. The thing that makes this extra special is attention to detail. Chose food your honey likes, try to think of everything so that you have everything you need to make it special!

4. Cook a recipe together - Get your Chef Ramsey on and heat up the kitchen by cooking a meal together. Plan a menu but have the number of take out near by, in case things don't turn out well. The key is too not stress out about it! Relax and let your creative juices fly! Again remember to set the mood, maybe if you are cooking a pasta dish turn on the French Cafe radio station on Pandora to make it feel more authentic!

5. Play Valentine's Day Guess The Food - With this one you can either use Valentine's Day food such as strawberries, chocolate etc. You don't have to stick to a theme, it is all up to you! Just make it fun! Blindfold and guess the food! You could also have your significant other buy his own food to make you guess so that you do not know what food is in play!


Some people hate Valentine's day, so you if are one of those people you don't have to be left out! Treat yourself to whatever it is you like and do for you! Or you can throw an Anti-Valentine's Day party!

I hope that these ideas have inspired you to think outside a box and remember, you don't need a ton of money to show someone you love them. You don't need a special day to do so either!

Whatever you do this Valentine's Day, I hope it's a great one for you!

                                           Xo,
                                      Michelle

Life Happens, And That's Ok!!

Hello Friends!

Whew! Things have been a little crazy lately, so I took a few days to untangle myself from the world wide web! (haha remember when that's what they called it??!) My Father in law is doing chemo every 29 days and his last does really took a toll on him and had another one Friday. My husband somehow hurt his shoulder and we have been dealing with doctors ourselves! Also my dear daughter Natalie turned 11 yesterday!

Yesterday we had a great day, we took Natalie to get her ears pierced and she handled it like a pro! I was so proud of her. It always amazes me how fast these kids grow up! I tried to explain to her that life is going to change as she gets older and things may be confusing and hard to understand, but of course at that age, you don't want to hear it. I didn't at her age. So we did a little shopping, a little eating and a little partying! I think it was one of her better birthdays to date!

With everything going on I just have been so run down! I have always been anemic since I can remember and I have to watch how I eat in order to maintain a decent iron level. I am really bad at this and usually have iron supplements around but I didn't have those either. This past week I had no motivation to really do anything, even get out of bed! I could tell that something wasn't right with me so I went out and picked up a bottle of Nature's Way Alive! Women's Energy Multi Vitamin/Mineral supplements. These things are loaded with good stuff! Fruits! Veggies! Vitamins! Minerals! So far I really like them. They are a little on the huge side and taste similar to how play-doh smells, but all in all, I think these will do just fine!

I am feeling better and things are calming down. I know better than to get comfortable because there is always another challenge for me waiting just around the corner. I know that hard time won't last forever, for you, or for me. I hope that you know that the storm won't always be hanging over your head and that you have the strength to weather the storm! May your tomorrow be better than today!

Xo,

Michelle

In the coming weeks I am going to be starting to use Hydroxycut - Let me know down below if you are interested in how it works, what I change as far as diet and exercise etc!

10 Random Facts About Me

Hello Friends! 

I hope everyone is having a great day today! I decided to do a 10 Things You Didn't Know About Me Post. Just to give you a little information about me. So without further ado....

1. I am left handed (Kinda?!) - I write left handed but throw, hit and just about everything else with my right hand. I can eat using either hand and when I was little I would practice writing with both hands.

2. I had Meningitis! - Back in the 90's when I was about 12 I developed Meningitis. This was right before the big outbreak happened, back when we had no idea what is was. If it hadn't of been for my Aunt, who is a nurse, I would have died. I am lucky to of had survived with minimal side effects.

3. I have a crooked tongue! - My tongue is off a few degrees because of having the Meningitis! Haha! It is only noticeable if I stick my tongue out at someone! I will take this side effect over major brain damage that I could of had! Plus it is a great thing to show off at parties!! 

4. I can speed read and retain the info! - This is a blessing and a curse at the same time! I love that I read fast, I can read a book like it's nobody's business, but being able to retain the info makes it so that I don't really read a book more than once.

5. I used to sing but I stopped. - Growing up I loved singing! I was always in choir class and Show Choir. Music is my life, if feeds my soul and I can always find a song to relate to how I am feeling. I also entered competitions and won. When I was 13, my grandmother was dying of Cancer, and had asked me to sing to her and for some reason I didn't. Since then I stopped publicly singing. I guess I felt that since I couldn't do it for her, no one else gets to hear me because she was the one who wanted to hear me the most and I froze. 

6. I attended a VERY small school! - When I say small I mean really mean SMALL! Our class had roughly 35 people in our graduating class. Our High School house 7-12th grade and we didn't have a football team. It was funny because you either had to be in band or choir (most people chose band) and when the band would perform it would just be for the choir basically! LOL Sidenote: I hated the small school at the time because EVERYBODY know everything about you, but I did have some very awesome teachers, and with such small class sizes we got a lot of attention, Our math class about 7 people in it.

7. I try to paint. - Ok so I secret obsession with watching Bob Ross paint. I could watch him paint his happy little clouds all day! I have a little artistic talent so I began my own oil painting using the same wet on wet technique that good 'Ol Bob uses. Fist let me say, it is harder than it looks! My "happy accidents" weren't so happy but over time I improved. My first painting, I thought was bomb! If you know anything about oil painting, it takes a LONG time to dry. So here is my awesome painting, I got work and come home, only to find that while I was gone my darling 2 year old at the time, thought it was a good idea to do a dance on my painting and smear it into the carpet! I was mad at first but after I laughed because his little foot prints were on the canvas. So I saved it. ;)

8. I was a certified medical assistant! - I love helping people! In high school I went to a Vocational School where I became certified. I worked in a Pediatrician's office, a Veterinary Office and a regular family practice. My goal was to be an x-ray technician. That was my dream job. Little did I know that 5 kids would deter that.  

9. I don't drive! - I have had my temps before but I have never had my license. I really don't have a desire to drive. The main reason I don't drive is because I have wickedly bad eye sight. SO bad that if I am not wearing my contacts in I can't see right in front of my face. It scares me that I could be driving and have contact issue and be stuck somewhere. With my glasses, I just can see on the sides of me. I never really picture me driving anyway. Funny Fact: Since I have never really drove for a long period of time, when I dream about driving it is always from the passenger seat! 

10. I am a free spirit at heart! - I was an only child growing up and wasn't allowed to have friends so I spent a lot of time alone. I love being in nature and seeing new things, trying new foods. Sometimes it is hard for me being a stay at home mom of 5 because I crave my alone time. This is something I work on frequently, it has nothing to do with my family, it is just what my soul craves. I know they won't be in the house forever and I will get to have my time again and that helps when when my soul says "GO!" (please don't take that as my soul telling me to leave my family! LOL that's not it at all! Hahaha!)

Well, there you have it! Ten things you may not know! I hope you all have a great weekend! Let me know your hidden talents or little quirks that you have down below!!

Xo,

Michelle 

Having Self Confidence After Being Broke Down

     Warning: Sorry if I rambled and that it is so long! LOL It just flowed out! ;)

      I was never the prettiest girl, I was small in stature but big in confidence. I would walk into a room and own it. I wasn't afraid to talk to people. I wasn't afraid to be the center of attention. During my dating years I had many relationships. Some good and some bad, but mostly bad. I had a love that I thought would last forever, but that love took a turn for the worse. I wouldn't say that he didn't love me. if anything he loved me too much and things got bad. It got to where if we were going somewhere I couldn't look out the car window because he thought I was looking at someone else other than him. He loved me with a fire that was visible to others around us. I was told that when he and I were together we glowed. I could see how much he loved me when he looked at me. Being young, 17 then, I thought it was magic. I didn't realize that I was in an abusive relationship. I just thought, "Wow, this guy really must love me, and he just wants me all to himself!" We were so in love, and also so stupid. So very, very, stupid. He would compliment me all the time, told me how beautiful I was, everything that a young girl dreams of hearing. Then the words turned hurtful. He told me I was worthless, that no one would love me. He started doing this after he started sneaking around with other girls. He ended up in jail because he bought alcohol when he was underage from his cousin who worked at a convenience store. I was there when it happened. It was awful and I was terrified of how my father would handle my boyfriend ending up in jail. I have always gone for the "bad boy,"

stupid to think I could fix him. He ended up getting sentenced to 9 months in county jail because he had already been in trouble for selling drugs. A few days later I found out I was pregnant.
      While all of this was going on I was also dealing with negativity at home in the form of my mother. My mother. My mother had a very rough upbringing and dealt with a lot of terrible things that happened to her. She always let me know how disappointing I was to her. I took care of her ever since I could remember and at one point in my first pregnancy I had to call 911 on her because she was threatening to kill herself. I would purposely get detention so that I wouldn't have to go home. My mother had such a hold on me and never let me do anything that a child or young adult would do. She needed me at home....all...the...time! This was hard enough to deal with and then you throw in that I am pregnant and that the father is going to be in jail for the whole thing! I was happy that I was pregnant (again young and dumb) I thought "Finally I could get away from my mother because I would have a child to take care of and not her". I was a senior in high school while I was pregnant. I graduated with honors and walked across the stage almost 8 months pregnant. That is a huge accomplishment.  I almost didn't go to my graduation because my parents were so embarrassed by me. If it wasn't my guidance counselor, who told me that I should be proud of everything I have worked so hard for, I wouldn't have been there.
      The pregnancy wasn't an easy one and I had complications that made me have to stay on bed rest. I was in constant contact with my child's father while he was in jail (my dad wasn't happy with the phone bill from his collect calls, oops!), and would see him when his mom would go to visit. When I was put on bed rest, he got mad because I wasn't going to see him. He started accusing me of cheating on him. And every time we talked he would just end up mad. He got released at the beginning of July. He informed me that one of his terms of probation was that he wasn't supposed to be in contact with me because when he was locked up and angry he would get into trouble. So I guess I was the reason for his anger. When I delivered my beautiful baby girl he denied she was his. He walked into my house with one of his friends, looked at her and said to me "That ain't my kid." and walked out. I was stunned and hurt and pissed. In Ohio when you are not married to the father of the child the state automatically goes after the father for child support (which only made him madder) and a paternity test has to be done. When the results of the test came in the mail I called him to make sure he opened that letter that said she was 99.9% his. He laughed at me. We tried to work things out and be together but he had changed. The name calling, and insults became more frequent and my self esteem got lower and lower. I was also still getting this from home as well.
       Having someone constantly put you down is awful! Especially when you are getting it from your mother.Eventually you starting believing the BS. I became very depressed and started having panic attacks. For those who have never had a panic attack, they are horrible! They feel like your heart is going to explode out of your chest and you can't breathe. I became a shell of who I was.
      Fastforward to today. Now I am 33. I am not the person that I was. It took me a long time to overcome how I felt about myself. It was not easy. It took WORK! it is still something that I struggle with. I had to except that the man I loved, didn't love me. He couldn't love me because he couldn't love himself. Neither could my mother. I had to forgive them. When I did that I felt free. I had to do a lot of self talk. Not like sit in front of a mirror and say "Gosh Golly you are great!." I had to fight out the negative thoughts that would come into my head. I knew those thoughts were not the truth. Just some one else's pain inflicted upon me. I has to cut ties from the people who would needlessly hurt me. For my mental and physical health. Cutting my mom off was the one of the hardest things to do. Every girl wants their mom around and when I got married and she wasn't there it was crushing, but I had decided that she was not going to be a negative influence on my children. Change doesn't happen overnight. It is a constant battle within myself to chase out those hurtful words. To this day I can hear the mean and nasty things that have been said to me but I have worked my ass off to become the women I am today, and without this experience I don't think I would be the women I have become. It would have been easy to hate them forever but then I wouldn't have felt the freedom I felt when I forgave them. Hating them would have given them power of me and they do not hold that power!
        If you have been in an experience where you are put down on a daily basis, know that you are not alone and that you are not those words. You can be whoever you want to be but it is going to take time and hard work. You may fail and that is ok. Faltering means that you are trying and that is step number one. Tomorrow is a new day and a new start. Be the person that YOU want to be, don't change because of what others say or want you to be! You are unique and your light shines like no one else's and if those people who hurt you don't see that, then they are not worth your time! It is better to be alone with your awesome self than people who don't value you and all that you are! Be proud of who you are and hold your head up high!

Xo,

Michelle

New Year, New Beginnings, And A New Blog

Hello Friends!


           Every New Year brings new opportunities and this year I have decided to redo my blog. I have a passion for writing and with my other blog it just didn't feel natural. It felt forced and I felt like I was writing for other people and not myself. My blog isn't just for myself though, if I can help someone along the way who may be in a similar situation then that will make me happy. I haven't decided all of the content that will be on my blog. I am just going to let it flow. I have learned along the way of life that planning never works out for me! So with that said I look forward to what is to come and I hope that you do too! Feel free to leave comments on things that you would like to read about in the comment section below! I appreciate any feedback from my readers! Happy New Year and Happy Reading!

                                                                Xo,
                                                            Michelle